So, Just How Big Is A Filbert Flower?

...in Cosmic Units of Measure, and you know, poetically speaking?

Though a filbert flower is far larger than the fattest freckle on a fine, freckled flea it is far finer than a Gherkin; finer even than a Cornichon, though hardly half the width of its neatly trimmed, stem end, which any proper princess knows never to eat, outright.

To be more precise, a female filbert flower’s floral diameter measures approximately the distance one, small, chilled, February raindrop will unfailingly fall during a mere, one eight-hundredth measure of one second, elapsed time.

Female Filbert Flower diameter = distance of raindrop fall in 1/800 second.

I have proof.

Of course.

Filbert Flowers, male and female, and a single, February raindrop, falling Earthward. Photographic cxposure time = 1/800 second.

This entire line of question and measure may seem somewhat nuts to you.

I assure you, it’s not.

Not yet.

But it will be.

In time.

For soon, when the winds of February blow, all those gangly, dangly, male, catkin, filbert flowers will release their pregnant puffs of pollen, practically promising then that some will fall favorably upon many of those miniature, magenta, female flowers’ sticky receptacles, invariably initiating that profound process of creating fat filberts, which IS absolutely nuts,

…as in hazelnuts.

Hazelnuts, toasted are the honey bee’s knees.

Ask any amiably aged, Gorgonzola cheese.

So I’m telling you, true, there are at least as many ways to measure a filbert flower as there are things to measure a filbert flower against.

Mostly though, they’re damned small. Small as a fly’s eye. Coupl’a mouse toes. Wee. Petite enough to overlook. Insignificant enough to ignore, which would be an immense shame, them being so pretty and all.

They’ve got their skirts up just now and I can assure you, it’s more than worth the trouble to slow your roll, stand a-tiptoe, take a gander.

Go ahead. Go nuts.